Thursday, November 20, 2014

Adoption Series 2014- Making a Family of 3 - Domestic Adoption

Today's adoption story comes from a family of three.  They hail from South Central Illinois where they are a farm family.  They are active in 4H as well. The farming operation is grain and dairy with B.W.'s family.  Although their road to becoming parents of their son was bumpy, in the end it all turned out to be  wonderful!  Join me in welcoming K.W. and B.W.and their son B.W.

This is their story in their words.  

After a miscarriage we struggled with infertility for several years.  We tried 3 rounds of IUI with becoming pregnant once to only miscarry as well.  So, a few years later we tried IVF. We did 3 rounds of that also which meant several trips to St. Louis to the IVF doctor. This meant hour drive from our house, but when you want a baby so bad you will make those trips and not complain.  Alot of them were at 7:30 am.

One of the IVF’s took and was 10 weeks along in my pregnancy. I had been to the doctor and everything was good. That evening my world was ripped apart,  I had a another miscarriage so this makes three.  I could not mentally and physically do another round.  Then my sister adopted a baby boy and then my husband and I decided that is the route we would also take.

At first I did not want to tell anyone I was adopting. I felt like a failure by not being able to carry a child.  Then one day I realized how will anyone know if I don’t talk about it?  Well my husband had mentioned to a neighbor that we were wanting to adopt a child.  So here is our story of adoption.

In June of several years ago my neighbor and her daughter came to our house and told us there was a possibility that a family friend was pregnant and would more than likely not keep the child as her mother was raising her first child.  So one fall day in October I got a call that the child had been left with the mother and it was a good chance we would be able to become parents to the child.

I called the adoption agency and had them prepare the temporary guardianship papers so we could have care of the child.  We drove and picked up the child. I was elated that I was going to have a baby he was 7 weeks old at that time! Unfortunately, once again my heart was ripped out of my chest and by the time we drove the hour home the birth mom was calling wanting her baby back.

I had a house full of people coming to see him and then had to tell them I had to take him back was heartbreaking.  So my mother told me you are not taking that child back to her! You are making her meet you at the sheriff’s office as I had no idea who she was.  My neighbor went with us to the Sheriff’s office along with my parents,  We waited and waited and 4 hours later she showed up (she was only an hour way).

She came into  the Sheriff’s office and didn’t look at the him in the car seat just wanted her baby.  She had no identification on her and the Deputy told her unless someone identified her she was not taking the baby.  My neighbor identified her because really we not have any  rights at the time.

We were devastated to say the least.  Over the next several weeks I was heart broke.  Then I get a call three weeks later that the birth mom has left the baby with someone.  So here was our chance again.  We were scared out of our minds.  I told no one as I didn’t want to feel like a failure again.  Then the day came and the adoption agency did all the paperwork in line and they had the baby for us to come and pick up.

I called my parents and told them so they could go with us.  My sister and her husband and newly adopted baby boy met us there as well.   So we drove to the adoption agency and picked up our bundle of joy!

I was still on pins and needles for a few months until the birth mom met the adoption agency and surrendered her rights.  That was the best feeling when I got that call! The birth father was not listed on the birth certificate.  He didn’t register with the Putative Father Registry in Illinois so I was pretty sure we were safe there.

On June 10, 2008 the Judge signed the papers and he was officially ours.  Now he is a spunky 7 year old that loves helping Dad on the farm.  We are very blessed.   Thanks for reading my story it did have a happy ending but there were definitely bumps in the road.

I would like to thank K.W and B.W. for sharing their story today.  As you can see sometimes the journey to becoming parents isn't an easy one.  Having biological children has it's bumps as well as adoption.   We are thankful they were able to adopt their son and create a farm family!

We will return Monday, November 24th with Chris and Stephanie's adoption story.  They are a family that has adopted twice!  See you Monday!

Thanks for stopping by!

1 comment:

  1. Every story makes me cry...the desire to love a child is beautiful.


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